“Year of Hell” is over and ready for 2020

(Quick! What show am I referencing?)

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My husband refers to this past year (2019) as our “Year of Hell.” (All Trekkies out there know what I am referring to).

Its because a lot of major things happened this year that…. just sucked.

It started immediately during the first week of January (when I was due back to work after my maternity leave) and I went to check my email of my full time job and I had no access. Yep! My email was gone. No communication whatsoever from the job I thought I had. So, after frantic texts to my manager and admin, with barely a response, I finally got a hold of the boss and it turns out that they did not want me back. Thanks.

I was scheduled to go back to work full time after my mat leave because my husband had recently quit his job, which was super stressful and he was having major health issues at that time (and his job was making it worse) and he needed surgery. So, it made sense for me to go back and he was to stay home with X, until he felt better and got a better job.

Now, we both had no full time jobs. I was still teaching, but adjuncts make pennies, and I was just coming back from mat leave, so I had nothing else really going on at the moment.

I contacted a lawyer the following Monday. Because of the settlement, I cannot really say anymore, but during the next 10 months there was a lot of back and forth (their lawyer was terrible as his job) but it all ended up working out the way it should. I had the best lawyer (and any NJ people that should ever need an employment lawyer, I can recommend an excellent one). That chapter of my life officially closed in August.

Back to my husband, who ended up having open stomach surgery. Yes, open. He was in the hospital for over a week (which drove him crazy, obviously). But the surgery was super successful and he is so much healthier because of it. After years of crappy doctors, not knowing what to do, and living in pain, he was finally getting help.

In the midst of this, we also had to move. Our landlord was selling the house. We originally wanted to buy a house (and got approved for a mortgage in Dec..and was actually house hunting), but suddenly with both of us out of full time jobs, the mortgage was now out of the question. So, then it was a scramble to find a new rental. Oh! And we decided to relocate too. Rentals in the area we were moving to were few and between. Most garbage. We did end up finding a really good one, on the perfect street, and with the best new landlords.

Packing and moving with a baby? The most stressful thing ever. Next time, we are hiring people to pack and do everything. Never again.

Then, after a really good summer settling into our new house, our oldest cat got sick. Like, cancer sick. He was our first “child.” We rescued him when my husband and I first moved in together, 12 years ago. He was with us through literally everything. Saying goodbye to him was incredibly hard and it felt like another chapter was ending in our lives.


A lot of people right now  are posting about all the good things that happened this past year. They don’t necessarily write about the bad stuff. Which is fine. Positively is always good. I just felt like I needed to be honest and real. There were other things that happened that I didn’t even mention here too. Honestly, it feels good to write this stuff out. I feel like I am letting go of all of it.

I am ready for 2020. Even though I cannot believe its 2020. The last past 5-10 years were a blur to me. I am ready for the new decade (that’s so weird to type).

I know that more good things will happen this year, than bad. Years like 2019 won’t happen again. The past is gone. We have really good plans for this upcoming year. I am super excited for my next chapter. Where I am now I would not have pictured this time last year. I am in a much better place, literally and figuratively.

Everything always works out the way it was supposed to happen. I have always believed that and through it all the craziness this year, I had always kept that thought in the back of my mind. We have gone through hard times before and made it out in an even better situation on the other side.

I don’t want to leave on a negative note, so here are some the good things that also happened to me this year.

  • We moved! A fresh start felt needed. Also an opportunity to purge a lot of the crap we accumulated over the last 12 years. I am also closer to my family. Less traffic, nicer people and just overall a calmer environment.
  • My son turned 1! Being a mom is the hardest thing ever, but every time I look at him, I am disbelief that this super smart, funny, and loving kid is mine.
  • I launched my Health Coaching business. Something I wanted for sooo long I am finally making into a reality.
  • I got a new class in a new school. I am so lucky to be able to continue teaching. I am at two great schools now. This is seriously the only job I have ever had that I sincerely look forward to and get excited to go to (I have an excuse to nerd out on all the stuff I love to talk about!).
  • I learned to macrame! Few people know this, but I became a hippie plant lover this past year and decided to make my own plant holders. I am slowly becoming a hippie now too apparently…haha. But really, its just a nice relaxing hobby that I enjoy doing.


Goodbye 2019!